I have always been a submissive type of person. It’s not that I don’t have confidence, but I believe in respecting elders and those of a more senior position than myself. However, over the years I have changed my ways. I realised that just because I am younger, it does not mean that I cannot speak up and give a good opinion. In fact, I recognised that I may even have a better suggestion than someone who may have more experience than I do.  Everyone can give their thoughts on a topic.

When I was submissive, I was a ‘yes’ man. But as I have changed over the years, I have learnt that it is okay to be equals with others in the workplace  even though I am younger in age. I now know I have things to offer that others may not. Most recently, I have been working with a lady who is very aggressive. I could not understand why I could not get answers to my questions, but instead she would repeatedly tell me that she had already answered them. She would become frustrated at me for asking more questions because I still did not have an answer, and then I would get frustrated because she would become aggressive. It was as if we were going around in circles.

Finally, it occurred to me that she did not have the answer. In fact, she didn’t even understand my questions. She was being defensive as she felt challenged and threatened. That is why she was being aggressive.  Aggression is “behavior which is intended to increase the social dominance of the organism relative to the dominance position of other organisms.” After I found this out, I looked around and noticed that many people are like this! I also noticed that such aggression doesn’t get them anywhere. In fact, it slows down the communication process because the aggression gets in the way and they do not end up getting what they want.

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3 Responses to Aggression

  1. Yes, I still believe there is a time and a place for the yes ma’am , yes sir type of mentality but there are other times where simply saying., “Oh, so would this also work…?” I guess I also come back at it in a more submissive way. I think being submissive is okay as long as you are not giving up your voice completely.

    • ACW says:

      Thanks for your continued support of my blog. You share a good point and appreciate the way you put it – it’s important not to lose our voice 🙂

  2. Geneva says:

    I would have to agree with the meaning of the term Aggression. However, I would like to say that I have been that aggressive woman a time or two,but I have been the one who has answered the questions several times and gotten no response as to completed tasks. It is very frustrating to be a senior worker and trying to help someone help themselves, trying to train someone in the same way that i was trainded. In todays blue collar world it is only fair to let people stumble, and the younger generation needs respect the fact that work is hard especially when you are doing it twice.

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